For days, 4...days‽
An unseen photo from the hike I took, on the route I generally take, been wanting to capture this exact photo in this exact style and framing for almost 2 years now.
Part of the reason I went out was because I'm pretty stuck this time around. I usually do the same loop either way, given winter, spring, summer etc. but each time it's different as time rolls on and more people come through and thrash the area around so it always looks different. Typically if ever I'm looking for inspiration with almost anything I can find it on this hike around, but this time was different because I already knew for a few days prior what I wanted to get started on. I chopped a lot of samples and got some loops from stock Windows programs on an old laptop and have been working on those plus a few more plugg beats, sstep team stuff, one or two flips and something I'm new to which is wheel housing Elxnce type beats. Regardless those are generally unimportant, except for the Elxnce beats, which stemmed from a complete rearrangement of my mental and it's perception of every relationship I've had with everyone since last year. I kinda felt that I almost threw myself into the heads of people by just prying for a connection, it'd become second nature to me almost and just made itself a weird personality type that worked but I either couldn't figure out why at the time or had no idea how to fix it in a way that was more authentic. Generally I'm a very closed off person but now it feels like I'm intentionally distancing myself from everyone I've wanted to be genuine with because I've searched for that connection on a deeper level and either can't find it or it's just not as "all there" as I made it out to be originally. Because of this I've been extremely fried in the head and everything I hold with symbolism or relation to a memory makes me physically ill (—ヘ—;), which is partially why I've been diversifying my music tastes again so I can find more sounds and lyrics to help me fight through this without turning back to anything that'll make it worse. This, if you couldn't tell, is how I found Elxnce, which both caused this and is helping me get through it, if I were to blame something id put it all on "makeover" that I'll never see some people like I did before.
