3ve's wor1d

Since starting the flip projects ontop of some original songs, I've largely nailed down the typical patterns that go into them. I've played these games before, a back & forth of confidence in others to move a certain way, to somehow pry for a reaction to something. I have a hard time telling what's real in others and I feel bad about it, but doesn't everybody have some kind of difficulty with that? It's like I don't want to totally open up until I fully trust that I won't be screwed by it, it's bit me in the back before and if it's preventable I'd like to keep it that way. And I know everyone wants that easy connection to others, I mean that's how you make friends y'know, but going further than that or using it as a footstool has always felt like a cheap shot. So that's the goal of flips that I'm working on, I've really been bored with not being able to put words to my own music properly so I sidelined it again to try and...

If not already starting as such, I get weird easily, sideways, if you will. In turn I beat it out of me with a lot of emo music, which I've only come into recently as of about 2024-25 in the later and middle parts of those years respectively. While seeming disjointed, I've made mention of how I feel as if I listen to whatever is thrown at me, sometimes it'll take awhile to stick as well, but once I have a grasp on a sound I like I typically don't deviate from it. Such is the case with how I even got into listening to it, Fall Out Boy. Revered as one of their WORST albums, I started what I consider to be a landmark in my music career on Folie à Deux which holds great significance in my life now (and I can't even get it on CD without paying +$30 (–⁠‸—)) since it's all I could stomach listening to around April, and yet I have no idea why. It's one giant art project that in retrospect I can't see how it failed, consider A Fever You Cant Sweat Out came out in...